Halloween Howlings by charlie smith
Jokes so bad they could kill you

Why is Dracula such a good proofreader ?

Because he is always looking for Type -O's

Why did Dracula quit smoking ?

He was tired of his coughin' (coffin)

What scared the chicken farmer at midnight in the chicken house ?

a poultrygeist

What scared the turkey farmer at midnight in the turkey house ?

goblins

what did the ghost of a statistician rattle on Halloween and where??
a markov chain in Monte Carlo.

Q: why did the angry witch have trouble getting home?
A: she was always flying off the handle
Q: what was the witch's favorite subject in elementary school?
A: spell-ing
Q: why can't alcoholics become ghosts?
A: they can't handle the boo-ze
Q: which restaurant won't Dracula eat at ?
A: Steak and Ale
Q: what beer won't a werewolf drink?
A: Coors Silver Bullet
Q: what are werewolves?
A: wolves in the past tense
Q: if Stephen King moved to the Research Triangle Area where would he live?
A: Cary (Carrie)
Q: Where did the NCSU finance office put Dracula's coffin when he shipped it?
A: Accounts receivable
Q: why did Dracula fail stereochemistry ?
A: he had trouble with mirror images.
Q: why are the hounds of hell always howling in distress?
A: no firehydrants
Q: What is the favorite type of music of a mummy ?
A: Wrap (Rap)
Q: What will the biochemist be for Halloween?
A: A Mean Old Acid (Amino acid)